Into The Mind Of an Extroverted Introvert

People are often categorized into 2 types: Introvert/Extrovert. These two personality types are polar opposites — introverts focus inward, into their own thoughts, and extroverts focus outward, into the world. While most people instantly know which category they fall into, there are some people who are not quite sure about their answer. We either stay in bed all day or go out at midnight.

Here comes the new category: An extroverted introvert. How do I know? Because I am one.

We are probably the most confusing people on the planet - we confuse ourselves most of the times. We are the polygon not fitting in any of the holes society has provided.

Here are some things you should know about us.

Paradox

Social interactions can either recharge or drain our social batteries. Parties can make us feel alive, switched on, and most confident - or completely bored, annoyed and withdrawn. We are strong and sensitive at the same time. We are very social but we rarely go out. There are days we jump around thinking out loud and days we rarely care.

Black and White

Things feel either completely satisfying or utterly pointless. We either think too much or not think at all. We either love wholeheartedly or hate passionately. We either stay too strong or break down completely. We either sleep for 14 hours straight or not sleep at all. We are either at black or at white. We don't know what gray means. We don't understand the concept of moderation.

Friendship

We talk to people easily. We mingle easily. People find it easy to talk to us. But our problem lies in maintaining a relationship. Making friends and maintaining them are two completely different things. We connect with people very easily, that’s not the problem. Since we are in a constant state of confusion, it is very hard for people to understand us on a deeper level. We need a lot of time to feel comfortable enough to share deeply meaningful stuff. (even though many feel very comfortable around us instantly).

Small Talk

“Please anything but small talk"

Just the thought of small talk makes me want to shudder. We would rather get hit by a bus than suffer through small talk. At times we physically can't stand talking on the phone.

We love conversations, but we are not built for small talk.

We always look for depth and meaning in relationships. While this can be stressful and annoying, once we find that someone, our relationships will reach a level of depth and rawness that most people can only dream of.

Mood Swing

One minute we are sitting around with our friends, laughing out loud. The next minute, the smile disappears and we are plotting our escape. Sometimes we make plans excitedly and when the day actually arrives, we would feel like killing ourselves.

We bounce between wanting to be noticed for our hard work to panicking over the thought of somebody else paying more than 30 seconds of attention to us. We either want to be surrounded by everyone or no one. Trust me, it is tiring.

Mixed Signals

Monday - "Let's rent a movie and stay in"

Tuesday - "Paaaaartyyyy"

No one can get a handle on us. Not even us.

Alone time

After every social event (no matter how fun it was), we are happy to be back in our room content sigh.

Effort

It is very hard to convince us to get out. But, if we do decide to go out, we would be the life of the party.

Dreamworld

We spend way too much time trapped inside our own minds. We literally have our head up in cloud nine most of the times.

Struggle

We have a constant inner struggle of controlling our introverted side.

“Oh no, it’s happening."

No.

"I have to talk to someone now."

But it’s so difficult. No.

"Yes, you have to talk or else you’re going to end up in your bed for the entire day and stuck inside your head for the entire night.”

Spontaneity

We can be very spontaneous, but there is a splash of common sense behind them.

Over-thinking

We are quick thinkers. We don't get nervous when making an impulse decision. In fact, we are good at that. What we suck at is thinking and analyzing a situation. Having too much time to make a decision is our worst nightmare. We think, then we over-think, and after that, we freak-out and then stay at an impasse. Indecisiveness is our Achilles’ Heel.

I wrote this to help people understand people like me better. But, if you could relate to everything I just said, then dum dum dum: You are an extroverted introvert too. WELCOME TO THE CLUB, BUDDY!